Homemade Tortillas…And Falling Off The Wagon

As you may know, I eat pretty clean.  It’s been one of the most important life commitments and goals I’ve made over the last seven years.  But having house guests for over a month really put that commitment to the test.

I knew before my guests arrived that things could get tricky for me during their stay.   My guests (AKA my mom and my step dad) view eating out as one of life’s greatest pleasures.  These two excitedly plan their lunch and dinner while eating breakfast.  For the first two weeks I did well!  I stuck to my convictions and to healthy eating.  I avoided the biggest temptations like a champ.  I brought my own homemade grain free bread to restaurants since bread is one of my downfalls.  I WATCHED as everyone ate dessert, and while I could almost taste the chocolate mousse in my mouth, my mind patted myself on the back for being so resolute.   When the family would go out every other night to the local ice cream shop (the same ice cream shop I used to visit up to four times a week back in my unhealthy days) I would either stay home for some needed quiet time or spend a half hour next door browsing in a clothing shop.  I was doing great and feeling great. Until….

On week three I had a an ever so subtle shift in my thinking and a moment of weakness.   It’s safe to say ice cream sodas are my Achilles heel and so one evening I thought “what’s the harm in just one ice cream soda with my family?”   Once the decision was made to stray from my goal,  I took on the mind frame of  “Go Big or Go Home!”  Within hours  I was quickly reminded of my old sugar addiction because now  I was intensely craving anything sweet.  It didn’t matter that I was full.  I was in sugar heaven.  This lead to several days of eating nothing that resembled Phase 1 and Phase 2 eating.  Think candy, cakes, and processed foods.  I didn’t just go off course, I abandoned the road completely and plummeted off a cliff, and I have to say I actually enjoyed the ride (or free fall) for a few days.  It was when I hit the bottom of that ravine that I was forced to face reality.  While in bed one night, I looked over at my nightstand and there were my old standbys.   Afrin for my stuffy nose, Benadryl because my ears and throat were so itchy I couldn’t sleep,  Pepcid for reflux, and ibuprofen for my sinus headache.  And also my asthma inhaler that I haven’t had to use in ages (and wasn’t even sure was still good).  Sound familiar to anyone?

My family looked on with concern as I walked around with a tissue constantly in my hand, and as I retired early to bed because the Benadryl zapped  all my energy.   I generally became less involved with their activities simply because I wasn’t feeling up to it.   After a few days of feeling miserable, I knew I had to go cold turkey and jumped right back on the wagon.  I said goodbye (again) to old favorites that certainly didn’t favor me back.

I’m happy to be back on course.   I’d be lying if I said I didn’t sometimes miss my ice cream sodas and other old favorites but I certainly don’t miss what they do to my body.  The feeling I get  from nourishing my body with healthy foods that give me energy, focus, clarity and a sense of well being can’t compare to the quick high of sugar.  Emotionally I feel better as well.  I sometimes think we must have some kind of inner compass that inherently guides us to what we should and shouldn’t be eating.  When I’m eating right, I feel right not just physically but mentally and emotionally as well knowing I’m doing the right thing by my body!

I thought these tortillas were a great way to get back on the wagon of healthy eating.  If  you are anything like me it’s almost impossible to go without bread so it’s imperative to have some on hand.   Enjoy these grain free 4 ingredient tortillas and whether you are on the wagon already or have fallen off and struggling to get back on, this recipe will surely help you on your course!

Special thank you to my editors Chris Hegan and Maureen Laraia,  many thanks for all your help!